Talksport Commentary

[Carlos J]

Matterface. It's surprising he doesn't get punched in the face more often. He's in full Kenneth Williams mode tonight, snidely disagreeing with everyone else about everything else. And his peculiar grasp of the English language grows worse. He seems to think 'to crow' means 'to ask about' or 'to discuss'. He's a deeply mediocre broadcaster - bad voice, poor vocabulary, zero wit.

Correct. He overdoses the soundbite shite, moresore with puns and trying something topical. Just tell teh listeners/viewers what they need to know. They don't want a comic or a shite Wilde. It really ain't hard.

Matterface and Murphy upstairs in new TS towers around the telly. Bewtiful, Mike.

[Carlos J]

Oh noes. Good away draw gone bad.

[James90125]

It's not vanilla, it's Neapolitan!

[JW90]

It's a Naples piercing for Liverpool's defence tonight!

[Erskine Might]

Poor old Fwank. Chelski lost even though Valencia had three old men and a few dogs playing. GOA is going to be furious they jinxed it this afternoon.

[Champagne and Roses]

Poor old Fwank. Chelski lost even though Valencia had three old men and a few dogs playing. GOA is going to be furious they jinxed it this afternoon.

I knew Chelsea would lose when on Breakfast Big Al asked Murphy "Can Chelsea win" and Murphy, after a long pause, said uncertainly "I think they can". His powerful loyalty to an ex-pro mate taking a long time to triumph over common sense. Al spoke to him for quite a long time then said goodbye. He then, in a jaunty and enthusiastic voice said "And coming up next we talk to UEFA cup winner Danny Murphy ….". The Ron Burgundy of TS.

[kentred1]

Proudfoot is still an utterly dreadful commentator

[Carlos J]

Matterface really milking the south coast derby.

[ccreds]

Half Time Biggles taking us along on Ts2.

[Erskine Might]

Aside from Matterface mangling multiple phrases, as per, his sidekick near the dug outs was just as hopeless tonight. At one point he exclaimed: 'And Hasenhuttl's mood is as grey as his tracksuit bottoms!' Eh???

[ccreds]

Get this shit off my radio!

[James90125]

Does this shit have a name?

[ccreds]

Oh I've forgot Jimbo.

[ccreds]

Tyldo seemed to caught napping when Palace got a penaly.

[Erskine Might]

I didn't realise Matterface was TS's 'chief commentator' until they called him that today. He's a joke. I imagine him commentating with loads of post-it notes stuck all around with 'witty' observations and phrases he dreamed up the day before with a view to shoehorning them into his commentary. Part of his commentary sounds awkwardly pre-rehearsed and the other part is either risibly banal or barely comprehensible.