Depression

[kevin04]

Lawns,the legend - some lovely words.

Just echoing the gang, but hang in there (aye, I know that's easily said) but keep yourself going. Have you tried doing some distance learning courses, you can even do them over the net? Even if it's just an access course or standard grade level. Something you've always fancied studying/learning or re-learning - a wee distraction from the job hunting and making some goals too and cracking on learning something new. Even if the luck isn't in at the moment with the job stuff, the college courses will help keep your mind and if you fire in to it, you might end up with grade results (a whole new career path).

How about volunteering? I'm looking at doing some voluntary work in 2020, and many places will take even take people who can only commit to even just 5 hours a week. It'll help keep you social, out and about meeting people and again you never know what doors it might open careerwise too.

Anyhoos, take care and hope 2020 is a much better year.

[m4rkb]

Hello Everybody, life is getting really shit. I've had 5 interviews and been second placed in all of them. Each time I've been told how good I am, yet the other person has more experience.

I'm now at the end of my tether and really don't feel I am getting anywhere as its putting a strain on my personal life. I don't know what to do as I'm getting desperate. I've even started to apply for anything and everything just to get a job, yet I don't seem to be getting any replies.

You’re trying too hard for another job. Take your time and allow yourself to be relaxed and prepared. Getting interviews in the first place is a positive development, if you’re going to jobs where you think the hiring company will give the job to the more experienced candidate, try to convince them you still are experienced, can use transferable skills, are an enthusiastic candidate that can learn quickly.

Bear in mind that it’s the Christmas period and loads of people are off from work. You should start hearing back in response to your applications in the start of the second week into the new year.

Don’t be negative, keep going. Do something to keep yourself mentally sharp and motivated. I developed a personal website, started learning intermediate German and French and did a fast track finance course earlier in the year when I was in between jobs and this really helped me keep personally motivated. Do loads of walking too at a fixed time every day. Sounds a little stupid but do stuff like the dishes, tidying up at home and stuff that make you happy when you’ve achieved something.

Fair play to you. There is some quality advice in there.

[carcinogen]

Be safe. x

[Hillman avenger]

Hello Everybody, life is getting really shit. I've had 5 interviews and been second placed in all of them. Each time I've been told how good I am, yet the other person has more experience.

I'm now at the end of my tether and really don't feel I am getting anywhere as its putting a strain on my personal life. I don't know what to do as I'm getting desperate. I've even started to apply for anything and everything just to get a job, yet I don't seem to be getting any replies.

Hi
I understand applying for "any" but that is probably going to make your success rate even lower as the employer will discard it knowing that.
As regards your experience issue, might be worth a different tack.
Most good employers are less interested in the volume of experience-within limits- as compared to the quality of it. So think through the experience you do have and find examples of things you have learned, and what you would do better next time.
If an employer perceives you as an active learner it will make you stand out.
Also agree with the volunteering. You need to find things where you can feel good about yourself because you are probably losing self-belief.
You're a red, so there's one!

[ikhlaq786]

Hello Everybody, life is getting really shit. I've had 5 interviews and been second placed in all of them. Each time I've been told how good I am, yet the other person has more experience.

I'm now at the end of my tether and really don't feel I am getting anywhere as its putting a strain on my personal life. I don't know what to do as I'm getting desperate. I've even started to apply for anything and everything just to get a job, yet I don't seem to be getting any replies.

You’re trying too hard for another job. Take your time and allow yourself to be relaxed and prepared. Getting interviews in the first place is a positive development, if you’re going to jobs where you think the hiring company will give the job to the more experienced candidate, try to convince them you still are experienced, can use transferable skills, are an enthusiastic candidate that can learn quickly.

Bear in mind that it’s the Christmas period and loads of people are off from work. You should start hearing back in response to your applications in the start of the second week into the new year.

Don’t be negative, keep going. Do something to keep yourself mentally sharp and motivated. I developed a personal website, started learning intermediate German and French and did a fast track finance course earlier in the year when I was in between jobs and this really helped me keep personally motivated. Do loads of walking too at a fixed time every day. Sounds a little stupid but do stuff like the dishes, tidying up at home and stuff that make you happy when you’ve achieved something.

First of all from all of my heart I have to say how amazing and kind your words are. It truly cheered me up and no matter what happens on this forum I must say that everybody has been so kind. I truly do not know what else to say besides once again thank you all for your wonderful advice and especially to you "kancutlawns".

I am now so much more optimistic that things will get better. Thank you.

[lambrini]

Hello Everybody, life is getting really shit. I've had 5 interviews and been second placed in all of them. Each time I've been told how good I am, yet the other person has more experience.

I'm now at the end of my tether and really don't feel I am getting anywhere as its putting a strain on my personal life. I don't know what to do as I'm getting desperate. I've even started to apply for anything and everything just to get a job, yet I don't seem to be getting any replies.

You’re trying too hard for another job. Take your time and allow yourself to be relaxed and prepared. Getting interviews in the first place is a positive development, if you’re going to jobs where you think the hiring company will give the job to the more experienced candidate, try to convince them you still are experienced, can use transferable skills, are an enthusiastic candidate that can learn quickly.

Bear in mind that it’s the Christmas period and loads of people are off from work. You should start hearing back in response to your applications in the start of the second week into the new year.

Don’t be negative, keep going. Do something to keep yourself mentally sharp and motivated. I developed a personal website, started learning intermediate German and French and did a fast track finance course earlier in the year when I was in between jobs and this really helped me keep personally motivated. Do loads of walking too at a fixed time every day. Sounds a little stupid but do stuff like the dishes, tidying up at home and stuff that make you happy when you’ve achieved something.

First of all from all of my heart I have to say how amazing and kind your words are. It truly cheered me up and no matter what happens on this forum I must say that everybody has been so kind. I truly do not know what else to say besides once again thank you all for your wonderful advice and especially to you "kancutlawns".

I am now so much more optimistic that things will get better. Thank you.

We know how you feel, ikhlaq, all of us have been there in one way or another.
Best wishes for 2020.

[kancutlawns]

Hello Everybody, life is getting really shit. I've had 5 interviews and been second placed in all of them. Each time I've been told how good I am, yet the other person has more experience.

I'm now at the end of my tether and really don't feel I am getting anywhere as its putting a strain on my personal life. I don't know what to do as I'm getting desperate. I've even started to apply for anything and everything just to get a job, yet I don't seem to be getting any replies.

You’re trying too hard for another job. Take your time and allow yourself to be relaxed and prepared. Getting interviews in the first place is a positive development, if you’re going to jobs where you think the hiring company will give the job to the more experienced candidate, try to convince them you still are experienced, can use transferable skills, are an enthusiastic candidate that can learn quickly.

Bear in mind that it’s the Christmas period and loads of people are off from work. You should start hearing back in response to your applications in the start of the second week into the new year.

Don’t be negative, keep going. Do something to keep yourself mentally sharp and motivated. I developed a personal website, started learning intermediate German and French and did a fast track finance course earlier in the year when I was in between jobs and this really helped me keep personally motivated. Do loads of walking too at a fixed time every day. Sounds a little stupid but do stuff like the dishes, tidying up at home and stuff that make you happy when you’ve achieved something.

First of all from all of my heart I have to say how amazing and kind your words are. It truly cheered me up and no matter what happens on this forum I must say that everybody has been so kind. I truly do not know what else to say besides once again thank you all for your wonderful advice and especially to you "kancutlawns".

I am now so much more optimistic that things will get better. Thank you.

You’re welcome Ikhlaq. Really hope it all works out for you. You can share your worries here whenever you want, we’re all a load of good guys generally. Good luck.

[Gosport Mark]

Hello Everybody, life is getting really shit. I've had 5 interviews and been second placed in all of them. Each time I've been told how good I am, yet the other person has more experience.

I'm now at the end of my tether and really don't feel I am getting anywhere as its putting a strain on my personal life. I don't know what to do as I'm getting desperate. I've even started to apply for anything and everything just to get a job, yet I don't seem to be getting any replies.

Ikhlaq, I can’t give you advice on job seeking or interviews, but I can tell you you’re not alone and you know this.

It’s interesting that you mention your partners family and their wealth/successes. You feel you don’t measure up? Money doesn’t make you a better person, or happier. It just removes certain issues. It doesn’t change you.

If you haven’t done so already, please I implore you to get in touch with one of the many mental health support agencies, which can be found on https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-an ... helplines/

People on here can give you advice and they have been very understanding and supportive, however these agencies can listen and help. Please reach out to them. You don’t have to suffer alone, because you’re not alone.

[kancutlawns]

Well said.

[colinthewarriormonkey]

Hello Everybody, life is getting really shit. I've had 5 interviews and been second placed in all of them. Each time I've been told how good I am, yet the other person has more experience.

I'm now at the end of my tether and really don't feel I am getting anywhere as its putting a strain on my personal life. I don't know what to do as I'm getting desperate. I've even started to apply for anything and everything just to get a job, yet I don't seem to be getting any replies.

You’re trying too hard for another job. Take your time and allow yourself to be relaxed and prepared. Getting interviews in the first place is a positive development, if you’re going to jobs where you think the hiring company will give the job to the more experienced candidate, try to convince them you still are experienced, can use transferable skills, are an enthusiastic candidate that can learn quickly.

Bear in mind that it’s the Christmas period and loads of people are off from work. You should start hearing back in response to your applications in the start of the second week into the new year.

Don’t be negative, keep going. Do something to keep yourself mentally sharp and motivated. I developed a personal website, started learning intermediate German and French and did a fast track finance course earlier in the year when I was in between jobs and this really helped me keep personally motivated. Do loads of walking too at a fixed time every day. Sounds a little stupid but do stuff like the dishes, tidying up at home and stuff that make you happy when you’ve achieved something.

First of all from all of my heart I have to say how amazing and kind your words are. It truly cheered me up and no matter what happens on this forum I must say that everybody has been so kind. I truly do not know what else to say besides once again thank you all for your wonderful advice and especially to you "kancutlawns".

I am now so much more optimistic that things will get better. Thank you.

I cannot stress enough how important the fact that you even got to interview stage is - having had xperience of dealing with new candidates for jobs, I can tell you that the vast amount of CVs go in the bin - so getting to interview is a major step.

One tip I'd give you is to look up everything about the company, look at their financials and their board.

A question that usually comes up in interview is "What do you know about us" 99% of people will know the bare minimum - for example if they went for a job at Currys they'd answer "You sell electrical equipment".

The one person who can say, I know your chairman is so and so - your revenues last year were such and such, you've expanded from X amount of stores to this many - etc etc etc. Will stand out massively over all the other candidates.

If you're getting interviews it's now just a numbers game for you. It'll come.

[subsub]

One tip I'd give you is to look up everything about the company, look at their financials and their board.

A question that usually comes up in interview is "What do you know about us" 99% of people will know the bare minimum - for example if they went for a job at Currys they'd answer "You sell electrical equipment".

The one person who can say, I know your chairman is so and so - your revenues last year were such and such, you've expanded from X amount of stores to this many - etc etc etc. Will stand out massively over all the other candidates.

If you're getting interviews it's now just a numbers game for you. It'll come.

Spot on, Colin

[paolo]

Hello Everybody, life is getting really shit. I've had 5 interviews and been second placed in all of them. Each time I've been told how good I am, yet the other person has more experience.

I'm now at the end of my tether and really don't feel I am getting anywhere as its putting a strain on my personal life. I don't know what to do as I'm getting desperate. I've even started to apply for anything and everything just to get a job, yet I don't seem to be getting any replies.

Just seen this old pal

Brave if you to reach out

It’s difficult to find answers at times and sometimes there are no answers

Finding strength, keeping self belief plus a little Lady Luck

Making changes is shocking, moves us out of comfort zones plus the feeling of dread and responsibility and the thought that you’re letting folks down

Every day that you get up, love your family and help your friends you prove you’re not letting anyone down

That’s before you’ve even submitted a resume

Allocate time frames to tasks

Make sure that you like yourself

Look at your family and realise what you did to bring them to this stage

Life is tough and at times it feels like it’s impossible

It’s a dark place but there is light, the problem is as people that we don’t know whether that light is a day away or a month away

Role play interviews to yourself when the house is empty

Look at alternatives such as Uber or just something to get you back in the groove

Join a gym or a volunteer group

I worked with vulnerable people and that helped

So many ups and downs in life and living is tough at times

Just make sure you’re doing something... keep trying....if you want to jump on a plane for a week, I’ll put you up and give you a car to run around in just for a breather... seemed to work for Harry!

A change of scenery and reflection can really refresh the mind

Write down everything you do.... made breaks, walked dig, tidied house, emailed four resumes, washed car, called a friend d not spoken to in ages

It becomes a little diary then you look back after a week and smile as you see how much you actually did

Pride and self confidence seep back in slowly

Big hug old friend

Pm if you need or plane to Vancouver island

Get there Sunday and you can help me collect an old Wolseley from the mainland!