Drinking

[Eaststand]

neither do I, wild turkey is doing that nicely tonight.

[Rowntree]

neither do I, wild turkey is doing that nicely tonight.

I never said you did.

[Hillman avenger]

My daughter died aged 40 last year after 10 years as an alcoholic.

Beautiful girl, well-loved, witty, first-class degree.

4 attempts at rehab, AA , endless fresh starts but it always dragged her back in the end. She was ashamed and drank alone , never enjoying it. In the end her body had just had enough.

If you know anyone or have a friend or family member who might be going that way don't be afraid to intervene. You will probably get no thanks, or even an aggressive response, but you will be glad you did in the end.

[Sadact7]

My daughter died aged 40 last year after 10 years as an alcoholic.

Beautiful girl, well-loved, witty, first-class degree.

4 attempts at rehab, AA , endless fresh starts but it always dragged her back in the end. She was ashamed and drank alone , never enjoying it. In the end her body had just had enough.

If you know anyone or have a friend or family member who might be going that way don't be afraid to intervene. You will probably get no thanks, or even an aggressive response, but you will be glad you did in the end.

Jesus, that’s horrendous.

So sorry to hear that Hillman.

[lambrini]

My daughter died aged 40 last year after 10 years as an alcoholic.

Beautiful girl, well-loved, witty, first-class degree.

4 attempts at rehab, AA , endless fresh starts but it always dragged her back in the end. She was ashamed and drank alone , never enjoying it. In the end her body had just had enough.

If you know anyone or have a friend or family member who might be going that way don't be afraid to intervene. You will probably get no thanks, or even an aggressive response, but you will be glad you did in the end.

I'm sorry, Hillman. This is so awful.

[Hillman avenger]

Thank you
But my key point is just watch out for it and catch it as early as you can.
Initially he/she will just go off the radar for a while , then be back apparently fine. That's the warning.
After that the returns will be shorter and lower-functioning and then you are on the vicious circle.

[Sid Pervcat]

My daughter died aged 40 last year after 10 years as an alcoholic.

Beautiful girl, well-loved, witty, first-class degree.

4 attempts at rehab, AA , endless fresh starts but it always dragged her back in the end. She was ashamed and drank alone , never enjoying it. In the end her body had just had enough.

If you know anyone or have a friend or family member who might be going that way don't be afraid to intervene. You will probably get no thanks, or even an aggressive response, but you will be glad you did in the end.

Jesus, that’s horrendous.

So sorry to hear that Hillman.

Ditto.


Sorry for your loss Hillman.

[Jonathan]

Sorry to hear that Hillman.

I have come across a few in my working life affected by drink. One of them managed to stop and rebuilt his career, another I have lost touch with but I suspect he’s still struggling with it as was in denial of his problem and another who passed away in his 40’s. It’s tough once it gets into you.

Fortunately I have only ever been a social drinker and now never to excess. Too old for hangovers, takes far too long to go away.

[blues4ever]

Sorry to hear that Hillman, I can’t imagine the pain in losing a child.

[Carlos J]

Thoughts with you, Hillman.

[kevin04]

I remember your post, Hillman (I think it was in D&D) around the time it happened. It was a lovely and moving post, and I hope you and your family are recovering. Such a sad story, but like you said, alcoholism doesn't prejudice.

I didn't start drinking until I was about 19-20. My pals all went down the beach at 15/16 with MD 20-20, Glen's Vodka or whatever they could get their hands on and get rat arsed every Saturday, I never fancied it, but would occasionally go out and stand around with them (could think of nothing worse than sit and listen to hammered people talking whilst you are sober yourself, now I'm in my mid 30s).

From 20-23, fairly knocked it back. Often 3-4 times a week going out, especially as a few pals were at uni and Thursday was student night - often we'd go out after our 5s league. I was working, but could go out Thursday night, home around 4 am, up at 8am for work and then finish at 3pm before often doing it all again on Friday and Saturday and occasionally Sundays too - pub quiz or karaoke usually after football. It was great fun, and the pubs were busy, mid 2000s, and coming fro a smallish town there was always someone to talk to, and especially if a tournament was on, it would be great watching 3 games in a row and then sitting in the beer garden on a belting day. We'd often get lock ins as well. A few nights strolling in at 0700.

Then through time and bit by bit the nights out became less frequent, some moved away, some married and had bairns, some focused on their careers and some stopped drinking. By about 28, the drinking and night outs had been limited to Christmas time and a catch up in the summer and often they would be at someone's house. Now in to my 30s, I meet my pals maybe once/twice a year for a drink. Last time was a wedding last summer in June, and then again we all went out in late August 2019. We're trying to meet up again in October or so, maybe it'll just be Christmas - for the ones who are around or in town - considering the way things are going with Covid.

I've gone large periods of my life without drinking. I feel sharper and fitter without it. At the start of lockdown, I had a project to do and started drinking probably too much to help deal with finishing that. I wasn't getting hammered, but enough to take the edge of and it helped me do the work. I can also have a beer and stop, I can also drink way too much than intended.

I think what stops me from being a regular drinker is the sluggishness the next day. The extra weight I tend to carry if I'm drinking, and feeling bloated, and as a keen hiker and runner - my fitness is always knocked a bit when I'm eating crap and drinking too much. So I tend to abstain for long periods - or have the odd beer, glass of wine, dram. I very rarely drink with food, occasionally a wine or a beer, but often it's just water. I love a blow out now and again either when meeting pals ; or a night out with colleagues once a season or at Christmas ; or even just 6 beers at home listening to music, but I couldn't drink every night. I know people who do and each to their own, I am not judging anyone and if unwinding with 4 beers a night watching football, then go for it , but I'll keep the booze for the special occasions.

We've probably all been arseholes on the drink at one point, but I think 97% of the time I am still the same person. A bit more nosy/inquisitive, a bit more annoying probably, and haver so much pish that I am cringing for days ; but rather that than being uppity or aggressive. I know a few aggressive drinkers and I've never understand why they don't just stop considering on the Sunday the ''Sorry about last night,'' texts come through.

Saying that, there is nothing better than a nice refreshing beer on a lovely summer's evening especially after having hiked, worked, or done something to earn it.

[Carlos J]

Lovely, honest and interesting post, Kevin. Can't do a reply to do it justice at ten to two in the morning, so will add more tomorrow.

[rorymac]

It nearly killed me so I'm ridiculously fortunate to be in my 7th sober and clean year now. I have to never let up on recovery but it became a pleasure a long time ago now.
So sorry about your daughter Hillman.

[Hillman avenger]

Thank you all.

I just suggest don't confuse over-drinking in social situations , with solo drinking to make the world go away. Both a problem, but different solutions.