Dan Woooootton

[JudgeTedd]

I hope Dan Wootton is having a bad day.

I’d like to put him in a sack and throw him over a dam

I'd like to take him to Castleford, and shoot him.

I’d handcuff his hands to behind a drivers seat, then stick a brick on the accelerator.

[Sadact7]

I hope Dan Wootton is having a bad day.

I’d like to put him in a sack and throw him over a dam

I'd like to take him to Castleford, and shoot him.

I’d handcuff his hands to behind a drivers seat, then stick a brick on the accelerator.

I’d like to colour his eyeballs in with a Sharpie

[gheko]

1:16 in would be good.

[Rowntree]

I'd like to insert a large brass instrument into his anus, and then kick him to death.

[subsub]

I'd like to insert a large brass instrument into his anus, and then kick him to death.

Good to see the forum in agreement about this despicable cunt.

[Sid Pervcat]

I'd like to insert a large brass instrument into his anus, and then kick him to death.

Underrated post

[Sadact7]

I'd like to insert a large brass instrument into his anus, and then kick him to death.

I’m very much in favour of this musical composition.

If I may, I’d like to provide the post script by using a giant gong to smash his head into a foul red ruin on the pavement.

[JudgeTedd]

I'd like to insert a large brass instrument into his anus, and then kick him to death.

I’m very much in favour of this musical composition.

If I may, I’d like to provide the post script by using a giant gong to smash his head into a foul red ruin on the pavement.

That would make for a tremendous encore.

Maybe a whole orchestra could trample over his badly beaten body as they leave the stage?

[Rowntree]

Maybe right at the end I could stick a flute down his cock?

[Sadact7]

I'd like to insert a large brass instrument into his anus, and then kick him to death.

I’m very much in favour of this musical composition.

If I may, I’d like to provide the post script by using a giant gong to smash his head into a foul red ruin on the pavement.

That would make for a tremendous encore.

Maybe a whole orchestra could trample over his badly beaten body as they leave the stage?

Yes. The Moscow State Symphony Orchestra squishing him out of existence.

I reckon we could get Channel 5 to broadcast it.

[JudgeTedd]

I'd like to insert a large brass instrument into his anus, and then kick him to death.

I’m very much in favour of this musical composition.

If I may, I’d like to provide the post script by using a giant gong to smash his head into a foul red ruin on the pavement.

That would make for a tremendous encore.

Maybe a whole orchestra could trample over his badly beaten body as they leave the stage?

Yes. The Moscow State Symphony Orchestra squishing him out of existence.

I reckon we could get Channel 5 to broadcast it.

We could get Skechers to sponsor the whole extravaganza. Jamie Redknapp to rope in his old man for that extra bit of celebrity cache.

[subsub]

The act of crass commercialisation that gives the lie to Meghan and Harry's claim that they asked the Queen's permission to name their daughter after her
It's a desperate and tacky new low that's enough to make any royalist's skin crawl.

A grim reality of Prince Harry's new Hollywood lifestyle that would leave his grandfather rolling in his grave.

A revelation that makes a mockery of the Sussexes claim that they asked the Queen's permission BEFORE deciding to name their newborn daughter Lilibet, the monarch's precious childhood nickname.

Because in reality it now seems like the first people Harry and Meghan told were the only group of advisers who really matter to them: The Californian bean counters who aim to extract millions of bucks from every aspect of their royal brand.

When most new parents would be concentrating every fibre of their being on making sure their newborn had a safe and happy arrival into the world, Harry and Meghan were buying up Lili and Diana domain names for their new daughter

No, this isn't a joke, they've actually admitted as much today, including one before the baby was even born.

It's almost as if he's been told by the DM what to say…

[Hillman avenger]

So the presenter is only fractionally less stupid than the people who tune in to watch them..

[subsub]

I know I shouldn't weep over a statue but watching Diana's two sons together - but so obviously still so far apart - was heart-breaking

It's unusual to feel emotional about a statue, right?

But the moment warring brothers Prince William and Harry – once each other's rocks – managed to put their monumental differences aside - at least for a split second - to jointly reveal to the world the Diana who will reign resplendent forever more at her Kensington Palace home, my eyes welled up.

On what would have been her 60th birthday, it was quite a sight to see the beautiful and dignified princess who changed everything towering over her two sons. Conscious to keep their emotions at bay, as royals do, the dukes attempted to be jovial, but the emotional weight of the moment was evident.

Both boys know in their hearts that their mother would be deeply distressed to know her sons no longer talk. Sure, there's been a few break-the-ice text messages about England's football success this week and they made a cursory effort in front of the cameras knowing their every utterance was under the microscope. But, in reality, the gulf between William and Harry is now seismic and, according to senior royal sources, possibly insurmountable. At least while Meghan is on the scene.

It's almost as if he's been told by the DM what to say…

[JudgeTedd]

“Honest” Dan Wootton there, talking about Princess Diana as of she was some sort of close personal friend. Just don’t mention the fact that Dan was only fourteen when she passed away.